This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or financial advice. Always consult with qualified professionals regarding your specific situation.

Legal Document Checklist — What You Need and Where to Get It

At some point, you'll need legal documents. Your parent will be in a hospital and unable to make decisions. Your parent will want to plan for what happens to their money and property. Your parent will want their medical wishes respected. Legal documents make these things possible. Without them, you'll be scrambling in crisis, trying to get permission to do things that should already be arranged.

The documents themselves aren't complicated. The purpose of each is straightforward. The process of getting them done is manageable. The hard part is usually just doing it. Most people put this off until something happens and suddenly it's urgent. Doing it in advance, when there's no crisis, is infinitely easier.

Documents You Need Immediately

An advance directive, also called a living will, describes your parent's medical wishes. What kind of care do they want if they're terminally ill? Do they want everything done to try to resuscitate them, or would they prefer comfort care? Do they want to be on a feeding tube? Do they want to be on a breathing machine? These are uncomfortable questions, but the advance directive gives people a way to answer them in advance, in writing, on their own terms.

A healthcare proxy, also called a healthcare power of attorney or medical power of attorney, names the person who should make medical decisions if your parent can't. This person has authority to talk to doctors, make treatment decisions, and see medical records. Without this, even close family can't legally get medical information from doctors. If your parent becomes unable to make decisions and there's no healthcare proxy, the process to get court authority to make decisions is complicated and expensive.

A HIPAA release form (also called a Patient Authorization) is a separate document that gives specific people permission to talk to doctors about medical information. Without this, HIPAA privacy rules prevent doctors from discussing care even with family members. Many hospitals ask for this at admission. Having it signed in advance saves hassle.

These three documents work together. The advance directive states what you want. The healthcare proxy is the person who makes decisions if you can't. The HIPAA release is permission for them to talk to your doctors. All three should exist together.

Financial and Property Documents

A financial power of attorney, also called a durable power of attorney, authorizes someone to manage financial matters if your parent becomes unable to. This person can pay bills, manage bank accounts, pay taxes, sell property, handle investments. Without this, if your parent becomes incapacitated, someone has to go to court to get authority to manage finances. That's expensive and time-consuming. With a power of attorney, things can be handled immediately.

A will describes how your parent wants their property distributed after death. Without a will, state law determines how property is divided (usually to children and surviving spouse), and the property has to go through probate—a court process. With a will, your parent can direct exactly who gets what, and having a will often simplifies the process.

A trust is an alternative to a will. A living trust is created while your parent is alive, assets are put in the trust, and when they die, the trust property passes to whoever they designated without probate. This is more complex than a will but avoids probate. In some families, a trust is important. In others, a will is sufficient.

A deed might need to be updated. If your parent owns property and wants to make sure it goes to specific people, the deed might be changed to add someone as a joint owner or the property might be transferred to a trust.

Why These Documents Matter

The documents serve different purposes. The advance directive and healthcare proxy are about medical care. The financial power of attorney is about managing money and property while your parent is alive. The will or trust is about what happens to property after death.

Together, they create a system where if something happens to your parent, things can be managed smoothly. Medical decisions can be made. Bills can be paid. Property is distributed as your parent wanted. Without these documents, everything falls apart and becomes someone else's responsibility.

Getting These Documents

An elder law attorney is someone who specializes in these documents. They'll sit down with your parent, ask questions about wishes and values, and draft appropriate documents. The cost is often two to three thousand dollars for a basic estate plan. In some cases, it's less.

Your state bar association can refer you to attorneys. The National Elder Law Foundation certifies elder law attorneys. An attorney who specializes in this area knows state law and common issues.

If budget is tight, legal document services like LegalZoom or Nolo provide templates and online services. For straightforward situations, these work. They're much cheaper, often just a couple of hundred dollars. For complex family situations or if your parent has significant assets, an attorney is safer.

Some employers offer legal document services through benefits. Ask whether your parent's former employer has anything. Some retirement accounts include legal document planning.

State-by-State Differences

The requirements for advance directives, powers of attorney, and wills vary by state. The basics are the same everywhere—but witness requirements, notarization requirements, and specific language differ. Using documents from your state is important. You don't want a power of attorney that's invalid in your parent's state because it doesn't meet requirements.

If your parent lives in one state and you live in another, that's more complex. Documents might need to be compliant with both states. An attorney in your parent's state can advise.

Storing and Documenting Documents

Once documents are signed, where do they live? Originals should be stored safely. Some people keep them with an attorney. Some keep them in a safe deposit box at a bank. Some keep them at home in a fire-resistant safe.

Copies should be accessible. Your healthcare proxy should have a copy of the advance directive. The attorney managing finances should have a copy of the financial power of attorney. The hospital should have a copy of the advance directive and healthcare proxy and HIPAA release.

Keep a list of documents somewhere accessible. Not just a list that says "has a will" but actual information. Where the will is kept. Who has copies. What attorney drafted it. This information helps if something happens.

If documents are in a safe deposit box, someone needs to be able to access them. Safe deposit boxes are locked after death, and getting them opened takes court order. Make sure the person who needs to access the will after death can get to it.

Updating Documents

Life changes. Maybe a marriage happens, or a divorce. Maybe an important person dies. Maybe financial situation changes significantly. Maybe values change. Documents should be revisited every five to ten years and updated if something major has changed.

If a document was created decades ago, it might need updating just because state law has changed or because circumstances have changed.

Having the Conversation

The hardest part isn't the legal documents. It's having the conversation with your parent. Many people find it uncomfortable to discuss mortality and end-of-life care and what happens to their property. Some people worry they're hastening death by discussing it.

Having the conversation gently matters. This isn't about forcing your parent to do something. It's about making sure their wishes are clear so that if something happens, people can respect those wishes. Doing this planning is actually about honoring your parent's values and autonomy, not taking those away.

Starting with "I care about you and I want to make sure your wishes are respected" often opens the conversation. Framing it as "this lets you control what happens instead of leaving it to chance" sometimes helps.

The documents don't have to be discussed in grim detail. "I want to make sure that if something happens, the doctors know what you'd want" is a simpler frame than "what if you end up in a vegetative state."

The Payoff

Once documents are in place, your parent has given you permission and authority to act. Medical decisions can be made. Bills can be paid. Property can be managed. The system works.

If something happens, you won't be scrambling or fighting with hospitals or discovering your parent's wishes too late. You'll know what to do and you'll have legal authority to do it. That's worth the time and money it takes to get these documents in place.

How To Help Your Elders is an informational resource for families working through aging and elder care. We are not medical professionals, attorneys, or financial advisors. The information provided here is for educational purposes and should not replace professional consultation. Every family's situation is unique, and rules, costs, and availability vary by location and circumstance.